Message from Sue

Through the miracle of modern electronics, this newsletter continued to be delivered to our Firehouse friends for the two weeks that Joe and I were in Buenos Aires.  From New Jersey, Fran, Steve and Terri contributed their parts and Tibor entered the week's wine and food contributions.  Meanwhile, I, in  Argentina, wrote my portion, consolidated the collaborative product, and sent it all out.  Pretty impressive!

             
Buenos Aires is our favorite home away from home, and we were just itching to go.  Fortunately, we were able to leave our baby (That would be Firehouse Tango) worry free because we have incredible friends who are more than willing and able to keep the Firehouse fires burning brightly - And from what I can see, they did that in spades.
 
 
 
We're thrilled to be back
 
What joy to return and be welcomed so enthusiastically by our dear Firehouse friends!  As much as we loved Buenos Aires, we're absolutely thrilled to be back home.  We love you all.
 
 
 
Thanks, thanks, and more thanks to the Firehouse Tangueros
 
Huge helpings of gratitude go to all of you who brought food and drinks; set up; cleaned up; and kept the Firehouse fires burning brightly while we were gone. We are very aware that our trip would be impossible without an enormous amount of help from the folks back home.  
 
 
The logistics - The Superhero Team
 
Special thanks to Terri Lopez, Steve Turi, Fran Chesleigh, and Pat Altman for making the whole shebang such a great success.  Terri, with Steve's help, planned; ran operations; and coordinated setup and cleanup (and that's not all.)  Fran and Pat executed the milonga lessons to perfection.

Were it not for Terri's encouragement,  we would not have gone last October and March, much less a third time. After seeing how well it went, Joe and I might decide to go again in a few months.  
 
These folks fielded the problems and glitches that seem to arise every week.  The tasks involved in running Firehouse are monumental, and we are incredibly fortunate to have so many fabulous friends willing to step in whenever needed.   
 
 
The newsletter
 
This Firehouse Tango newsletter has been published nearly every week since March, 2002 and thanks to Fran and Pat, the past two weeks were no exception.

Among his countless talents, our remarkable instructor, Fran Chesleigh, is a professional writer.  As always when I am out, he and his equally extraordinary assistant, Pat Altman, flawlessly and with a style of their own, take over the task of writing the Firehouse Tango newsletter.  I, helped by the aforementioned modern technology, then send out their handiwork directly from our apartment in Buenos Aires. 
 
This awesome duo is usually found at "Fran's Table" in the alcove closest to the DJ table.  They are always happy to answer your Tango questions or show you how to do something you might have missed, so make sure to take advantage of this wonderful opportunity to learn from the best.   
 
Superman Steve Turi had his own byline as Clean-up Editor. and Terri Lopez had hers as Other Stuff Editor.

 
The music - DJ Richard Ariza
 
Aren't we fortunate to have such a wonderful DJ in our Firehouse Family?  We heard the music was marvelous.  What a pity we couldn't have been there!
 
 Once again, Fran's tribute to Richard was over the top.  Knowing Fran, I can tell you that he doesn't throw his praise around lightly.
 
Here's some more information about Richard: he hosts the delightful Friday afternoon and Sunday evening milongas at Triangulo WWW.TANGONYC.COM.  He has guest-DJ'd at many New York and New Jersey milongas, and we've had the pleasure of his company - not to mention DJ expertise - quite often at the Firehouse.  If you haven't been to Triangulo, you don't know what you're missing.  You'll find information below in this newsletter about Rich's Sunday Domingo Club. 
 
 

Calling all Tan-ghosts and Tan-goblins - Halloween Milonga   Next Thursday October 31st - Come costumed or not to Firehouse Eleventh Annual Halloween Milonga

Our Halloween party features:

• Belly dance performance by Belly-Tangueras Debbie Glaser and Brenda Gaines
• Door prizes
• Parade of the Firehouse Tan-ghost and Tan-goblins
• Awards for best couple, most creative, funniest and sexiest costumes
• Additional half hour of dancing
• Tango lessons by Fran Chesleigh and Pat Altman
• Buffet dinner
• Milonga

Join us  next Thursday, October 31st for our eleventh annual Firehouse Halloween Milonga (regular lessons from 7:00 to 9:00.) If you don't have a costume, don't let it keep you away, but come, dance and cheer for your friends. Costumed or not, expect a great evening. In addition to awards for the most creative, best couple, funniest and sexiest costumes, we've got some great door prizes (costume not required to be eligible.) 

Of course, also included in the low price of only $15 are basic and intermediate tango lessons taught by Fran Chesleigh; a buffet dinner; and dancing and socializing with the fabulous Firehouse tangueros.

 November 28th - Thanksgiving day - no Firehouse Milonga

Firehouse Tango will be closed on Thanksgiving Day: Thursday, November 28th.  We hope you'll enjoy the day with your family, as we all will - and, of course, we'll look forward to seeing you on the following Thursday evening, November 29.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Birthday of Judy Assisi last Thursday, October 24

Judy brought a delicious ice cream cake from Uncle Louis G's in Maywood.  We all sang Happy Birthday to celebrate yet another year of Firehouse fun.

From Mike Porro - Tango Loco IV November 30th in Midland Park

We'll be hosting as Tango Loco IV on November 30th at Grand Ballroom another After Thanksgiving Milonga & Auction to raise money for our local food banks.  We raised $2,370 last year and decided that this would be a great tradition to continue.  We'll fill in the particulars over the next several weeks, but want to get a SAVE THE DATE notice out now in order to avoid conflicts with other activities that could be scheduled on this date.

For more information, e mail Mike Porro at porro@erols.com

Hi everybody, Fran here with your Tango Tip of the Week. Two of the complaints that seem to come up again and again in the Tango community are:

1.     Men are always teaching.

2.     Women are always taking the blame for things that go wrong.

In the first place, neither of these statements is always true. There are certainly many men who don't make it a habit to teach their partners on the dance floor, and not every follower rushes to take the blame every time something goes wrong in the lead/follow collaboration. However, there is little doubt that the behavior remains pervasive.

To be sure, these somewhat knee-jerk reactions to problems on the dance floor can often be attributed to longstanding cultural imbalances between the sexes within our culture, which unfortunately linger even now.  Men still tend to think of themselves as dominant in the male/female relationship, while women are all too often willing to take a back seat. This has been changing in (some, but decidedly not all) parts of this country, since women got the vote. However, remnants of this archaic but well-entrenched stance persist nonetheless. Personally, I don't know how to solve the overall cultural situation -- except to try my best not to engage in this kind of behavior myself -- and to teach my students to be sensitive to their partners.

Another thing that can be explored here is to examine a more finite, technical cause for the behavior, a cause which might just be inherent in the roles played by each of the partners within the dance relationship.

Here's what I mean. When a leader (usually the man) attempts to lead his partner to take a step, he knows in advance what he wants her to do, and he maintains the confident -- albeit sometimes misguided -- expectation that her response will be to execute that particular step. If that does not happen -- and he's a skilled leader -- he'll almost surely ask himself "What did I do wrong to mislead her." And he'll try the lead again. On the other hand, if he really doesn't yet know how to lead, he'll probably wonder "What did she do wrong." (It's not fair, but it is what happens.) What then occurs all to often is that the leader will decide to "teach" her what to do -- rather than try the lead again, and see whether he can make it work.

Now, let's look at this situation from the follower's perspective. First of all, she has no idea what her leader wants her to do before he invites a step through his lead. Once he asks for something, she has to interpret the lead, and then execute the movement. If she's a skilled follower - and if he gives her a good lead -- she will, in all likelihood, respond by taking the step. But she might not, if the lead can possibly be interpreted in more than one way, or if, let's say, she becomes momentarily distracted. So, even in the best of circumstances, things may go wrong. If she's a skilled follower, she'll realize in this moment that all she can do from a practical standpoint is wait for another -- maybe better -- lead. But if she's not so skilled - and if her partner is either giving her the evil eye or is pleading with his eyes for her to do something, anything -- she'll either try a step on her own (always a bad idea!), or become completely paralyzed. In any event, she'll definitely end up taking the blame for whatever seemed to go wrong.

What's the solution to all this?

For leaders, the answer is to learn how to lead, and then to recognize that even the best leads don't always work. When things go wrong, don't resort to teaching. Bite your tongue, and try your lead again. If all else fails, find a teacher who can help you solve the problem. If you know beyond the shadow of a doubt that she really is at fault for something that has gone wrong, you might gently suggest -- if she asks -- that a lesson or two with a professional might be a good idea. But that's it! Keep your impulse to teach to yourself.

For followers, stop blaming yourself immediately. If a leader insists on explaining to you what you're doing wrong, find another leader. (I know, I know. If you're married to the guy, this can be a problem.) If the same problem recurs with several different leaders, consider finding a good teacher who can help you fix the problem.

Ultimately, dancing Tango is supposed to be fun -- not an exercise in dominance/submission. Let's all try to keep that clearly in mind the next time we step out onto the dance floor.

Fran and Pat's Milonga DVD series now available

If you haven't gotten your copies of Fran and Pat's Milonga DVDs, make sure you pick them up soon. This is a series of four DVDs, which cover everything we've done during our four weeks of Milonga at the Firehouse, along with lots of steps we didn't have time to work on. The series of 4 DVDs costs $100, and is packed with information about Milonga right from the basics all the way to some very challenging advanced material. People who already have these DVDs think they're great (thank you very much!), and we think you will, too. Be sure to add them to your collection.

Fran teaches at Dance Manhattan from 11:00 a.m. until 4:00 p.m. every Saturday. He offers a beginner class in Milonga & Argentine Waltz at 11:00 a.m. as well as an intermediate class in Tango at noon. From 2:00 p.m. until 4:00 p.m. Fran and Pat host a special beginner/intermediate practice for bringing your skills up to speed. The cost for the practice is $10 per person. (Bringing a partner isn't necessary.) Fran and Pat are always on hand to answer any questions you may have about your dancing, and to help you with material you're working on. If you want to take Fran's classes, call Dance Manhattan at 212-807-0802 to register. If you'd like a private lesson, call Fran directly at 212-662-7692 or email him at franchesleigh@mac.com. For the practice, all you have to do is arrive with $10 and your dance shoes in hand.

The following folks helped set up, break down and clean up before and after the milonga. Without them, there would be no Firehouse Tango.

• Terri Lopez - 
• Terri's son Joe
  
• steve turi 
• Steve Maisch
• Jesse Barton
• Tsipoyra Sartan
• Mary Epiphan
  
• And lots of other folks for so much help.  I was ready to pack up and send everybody home
  

• Adrienne Burton
• Matthew & Janice Ficarra
• George Ngo
• Bob Brillo
• Rafael & Hilda
• Horatio Piccioni
• Jesse Barton
• Francis & Marie